Character Bio

Recently, a bunch of my friends and I began a Dungeons and Dragons campaign, and as such I had to create a character. I'm the type of person who takes this sort of thing seriously, so decided to write a backstory and some special rules for my hero, as I figure it's always more fun to play as someone with a bit of personality.
Our DM manages a Games-Workshop, so it made sense that we set our game in the 'Warhammer' universe. After a bit of thought I came up with a bio I liked and thought would be fun to play:

Name: Tzega Dreamcaster

Type: Eledrin Wizard (Controller)

Age: 17

Birth Name: Dogshite Shadowmelt

Dogshite was the 14^th child of the Eledrin couple: Esmerelda and Lucius Shadowmelt. His parents were drunkards and had been exiled from the Feywild after being caught stealing Moonshine from the shamans stores. Travelling across the sea they arrived at Marienburg where they each took jobs as barmen, remained alcoholics, and began a family. When their 14^th child was born they were both too drunk to think of a proper name, and in their drunken haze christened him 'Dogshite', as it was “hilarious at the time”. His first meal from his mothers teat was so alcoholic that he became addicted then and there, and was constantly drunk up until his 15^th birthday.

On the 15^th anniversary of his birth Dogshite went to his parent's tavern, where he would hide under tables and sneak drinks from passed out customers. As usual he set up camp in a shadow near the bar, and began to quietly quaff anything that was left unattended for more than a few seconds. Late that night, after enough alcohol to kill a large goblin, he was caught trying to steal a drink from a customer who wasn't as drunk as he had thought, and was being dragged out of the tavern by the scruff of his neck when he scrambled free and turned on his captor. Not really thinking, he punched his assailant as hard as he could, and to his great surprise the man turned into a trumpet. Seeing this the other drinkers in the bar accosted him, and held him down until the City Guard arrived and took him away to spend a few days in the cells while they worked out what to charge him with.

He awoke early the next afternoon, still drunk as usual, and reached out for his 'jump-starter' triple shot of Dwarven whisky. However due to being incarcerated, he was unable to get his waking hit, and began the slow and incredibly painful process of sobering up for the first time ever.

Eighteen hours later, the guards returned to his cell, and found, in place of the dribbling, speech slurring vagabond they had picked up the day before, a sober and fiercely intelligent young Eledrin, playfully sending showers of sparks from his fingertips. Their prisoner then eloquently explained to them that if he had stolen from and attacked someone then surely there would be a victim to present their case, and the lack of this elementary piece of evidence rendered him innocent. Upon being released, and pausing only briefly to collect his trumpet from the jailer, he made his way back to the bar, where he explained to his stunned parents that he was in fact a genius and had considerable magic ability, but had always been too sloshed to realise. Bundling up all his worldly belongings (a set of teletubby shotglasses, a tankard shaped like a teddy bear and 3 bronze pieces saved from the time he had accidentally walked somebody's dog for them) he left home, choosing then to adopt a new name (inspired by something he had heard a Japanese tourist saying): “Tzega Dreamcaster”.

Having left his home, he became apprenticed to a travelling Wizard, following him from city to city, learning as they went. Tzega found it hard to kick the bottle, often turning up to lessons drunk, but as the time passed he mastered the art of drunken magic, finding that he could perform spells equally competently whether intoxicated or not. However his decision making was certainly still affected, and on more than one occasion he and his master had to leave town in haste after Tzega drunkenly blared on his trumpet and then transformed the interfering city guards into mice.

After 2 years of tutoring, with all the wisdom of a 17 year old, Tzega declared himself ready to face the world alone and left his master in search of fame and fortune. He returned to his home city and declared himself available for hire, and this is where we meet him now...

Special Rules 

Alcoholic: Due to his past, Tzega finds it very difficult to be around alcohol or drinkers. When in a tavern or around alcohol, every 10 waking minutes he must take a will-power roll to see if he has a drink. For every drink he has had in the previous 4 hours he takes a -1 modifier on this roll.

Hardened Drinker: Having grown up with alcohol in his veins Tzega is unaffected by the normal rules of intoxication.

Drunk and Disorderly:
As he becomes more and more drunk Tzega's alignment moves from True Neutral to Chaotic Neutral. 0 drinks = 100% TN, 6 drinks =100% CN.
As he becomes intoxicated, decisions Tzega makes become increasingly random. Dice rolls decide his behaviour, with modifiers added for each drink consumed. 

Brass Knuckles: If Tzega ever kills a creature with a melee attack, roll a D6. On a 6 the creature transforms into a random brass instrument. For every drink Tzega has had in the last 4 hours, the number needed for transformation falls by 1 to a minimum of 2.

It's not very often I get to do creative writing like this, and I really enjoyed it. I plan to possibly write up the gaming sessions we have in the same style, so maybe one day I'll have a substantial body of work built around this character and his party.